As time grows closer...

For those of you who read my blog frequently (prob 2 of you- hi!), you know that our OB apts are every Friday. This week went by so fast! Ayla is napping and I am trying to take it easy. But, its hard to clear your mind even if your body is resting.

Things have really been great for this pregnancy. No big problems. A few ups & downs, but overall I can't complain. I thank God every day for this lil girl inside me. I crave to feel her move and smile every time I feel a kick. Lately, I have been a little "crazy mom". I hesitate writing it, but I thought one day I would laugh at my neurosis.... I hope.

A back story on Ayla's 'labor' day. I was working my usual 12hr shift when I thought I began to spot. I freaked out a bit. Then called my MD. His nurse told me to go home and rest. I immediately went to my charge nurse and said "Im leaving" then broke into tears. I look back now and am like... woah, I just left my patients to her, poor girl! I got home and took a shower then lay down on my bed. Jeff came home so I sent him out for Mac n Cheese (don't judge). I had just worked 11hrs without any food. He obliged without hesitation. Not more than 3 mins after he left my water broke while laying in bed. I froze. Really. Everything I knew and thought I knew went out the window. But, then I was like ok... this is gross. HA. It was like a SNL skit after that me trying to fumble around calling Jeff while a towel in between my legs. He got home and I stood there in my soaked panties, wrapped in towels. Not my finest hour. We called L&D and off we went. I was 36 weeks pregnant, and a peace was over me that everything was going to be fine.

Speed up to today... as I type through contractions. Yep. All week... contractions. : / Every time I go to the bathroom I expect to see me spotting again or something. I am seriously slightly obsessive. Which is where my neurosis only begins. Thinking about her and her arrival consumes me. Thankfully, Ayla helps because she keeps me busy. But, its times like this as she naps that I get to think.

Tomorrow I will be 35 weeks pregnant.

I, again, have a peace over me that when she decides to come today or in 4 weeks; everything is going to be how it is written. I know God has a plan for me and my daughters. Its hard to always give up control. But, pregnancy is one of those awesome responsibilies that we are given. We don't have control of the outcome but get to enjoy the closest ride.